Raising a Mixed Baby

By Abigail Martina (@abigail.martina)

Thursday February 2, 2017, changed our lives completely. He was finally here after carrying him for 40 weeks and 5 days, our son Caleb James. 50% Dutch/ 25% Surinamese and 25% Caribbean, made out off 100% love. Our own mixed baby!

When he cried for the first time it really sounded like music to my ears. Can you believe it? I guess  all clichés are true! The pain disappeared (well temporarily :-) as snow in the sun. From the moment the doctor placed him carefully on my chest, his cry instantly changed in a satisfied sound of relief, he looked at me and I felt it, he knew me! So many different emotions flooded at that moment. The biggest realization that felt like a warm bath was the fact that I, Abigail, suddenly became a mom.

I want to take you guys back into my background. My husband and I have been together for 9 years, of which 4.5 years married. He is Dutch and I’m half Antilian/ Surinamese so that makes our son a real mixed baby. We are so called an Interracial couple. (See our story; How we met) 

From the moment we knew we were expecting we already discussed that there was no such thing as an interracial way of nurturing, the foundation should be: LOVE! In that way we didn’t want to put too much emphasis on each other's culture. And I’m not saying we don’t use a bit of both of our cultures, but it’s not a battle between who’s culture is the most influential. The biggest challenge is therefore to work as a UNIT. In the end, Caleb should not see any differences in the way we nurture him.

‘’I refuse to choose’’
The plus of a mixed family is the diversity of cultures! What ultimately stands out in a nice fusion. I speak from experience being a mixed kid as well. That’s why when people ask, Abigail are you more Surinamese then Caribbean? For me it's like choosing between my mom and dad. And I REFUSE to choose. And therefore I don’t want the same thing for my son. See it this way, both cultures have their qualities and differences but together makes it dynamic!

But the funny thing about raising a mixed kid is that the kid doesn’t even know that he’ s mixed (in this early stage). All he wants and need is to be loved.

And that’s what are we going to do! (For the rest of his life).

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For more from Abigail, check out her YouTube channels 

Abigail Martina

Josh & Abi

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